THE SOUND OF GOODBYE…

It feels so difficult to let you go,

But I can’t hold you back, I know.

Goodbye, my love,

Live well and long;

I’ll miss you so much,

Your heart is where I belong;

Walk away if you must,

Go, make your life a lovely song…

I’m not sure if I can live like this,

Remembering and savouring the feel of your kiss;

Each memory a falling leaf,

Searing my heart, bringing me grief.

Yet, I won’t ask you to stop,

I’ll swallow every sob;

Walk away if you must,

I’ll always love you…

I’ll miss you so much...

A thousand questions fill my mind,

But a single answer I can’t find;

Every feeling bruised and uncertain,

My heart is all aching and broken.

Yet, I won’t demand a single word,

Even though it may hurt like a sword;

Walk away if you must,

I’ll always love you…

I’ll miss you so much...

Every moment spent with you,

Is a splendid shade of the love-hue;

Let me breathe-in its heady fragrance,

Tomorrow I may not feel its scent.

Yet, I won’t ask you to bring me colours,

For, life without you will lose its vigour;

Walk away if you must,

I’ll always love you…

I’ll miss you so much...

Goodbye, my love…

Live well and long…

Imperfectly Perfect...

A pleasant day…bright and clear…perfect for an outing. I get ready in anticipation of a fun filled day and gear up to finally meet Dabbu after a long time :) I put on my shoes…grab my wallet and… tringgg…Dabbu calls to say that I should not leave as yet. Hmmm…ok…so I log on to g-talk and luckily a friend is online. I am like…Thank God, I’ve got someone to chat with. The conversation just gets interesting when I get another call asking me to reach the destination. Well…I’ve already waited this long…a few more minutes won’t hurt I guess. So I chat for another 10 minutes before logging off. I put on my shoes…once again…grab my wallet…once again…and reach the door…and… hell!!! It starts raining right before my eyes!!

All day long there is not a drop of rain and when I am about to leave, the sky erupts! Wonderful…this is all I needed. I inform Dabbu that I might be late…and if it continues to pour with this speed then…

But finally the rain slows down and I get a chance to escape. Mind you…I don’t have a full raincoat and I still risk the raging weather. So...the journey begins…me in an oversized jacket happily taking off for the destination. Hardly do I travel a kilometre than the rain crashes on me! Still left with a long journey ahead…I am completely drenched. And hey…the story has just begun. Just where the rain is the heaviest, my dio starts betraying me...she refuses to move ahead and stops right in the middle of the road. Hell…why didn’t I treat her with petrol before leaving?? Well…what’s done is done…so here I am…pushing my way through a water filled road all the way to the petrol pump. As if that weren’t enough, I realise at the petrol pump that I have forgotten to refill my wallet! I just hope now that I’ve kept yesterday’s change intact. And yes, I do find some cash…barely enough to get me to the destination.

Now…petrol filled…money paid…frustration relieved a bit…but the damn dio wont start!! God! It takes me full 10 minutes to get the thing started. And finally…I leave the petrol pump with a sigh. And when I think nothing worse can happen to me now, just the opposite occurs. I decide to go through the main road to avoid muddy splashy lanes. But luck just deserts me when I need it the most. The main road is so full of water that I am scared of slipping and falling right into it!

To add to my woes, the 4-wheeler drivers act over-smart and assume it their right to give us, the 2-wheeler drivers, a muddy shower! Well…fine…ok…I convince myself that just some distance is left and finally reach Dabbu’s place…all drenched…from top to bottom…clothes soaked in the muddy water…water dripping off my hair, my face, even my shoes…[sigh].

I ring the bell…aunty is right there. She watches me and gives a sympathetic smile which says ‘its-alright-these-things-happen-all-the-time’. And then Dabbu has to look at me and give one of those mocking looks! Aunty gets me a towel and insists that I change. I stand there holding a towel, embarrassed like hell! Try as I might, both, aunty and Dabbu, are not convinced when I say I don’t need a change of clothes. After a series of failed attempts, I finally change and aunty (bless her :) ) lovingly tells me not to be formal and awkward and that she always encounters things like this.

At long last…there I am…at Dabbu’s place…in Dabbu’s clothes…hoping that atleast the day gives me more than I expected. And the time that follows is filled with lots of smiles…some laughter…some fights…some patch-ups…some snaps…and a lot of tickling :)…

The day turns out to be a remarkable one for me…another leaf in my kitty of memories…meant to dry someday…but always to be present in my diary. The day, I say, is not the perfect one…but its Imperfectly Perfect…

I Am Sorry…Am I?

People are becoming more materialistic by the day. This acquisitiveness overpowers them so much that they fail even to understand the needs and wishes of their parents who raise them with such love and care.They become so selfish that they place their wants and luxuries above everything else. And when they say ‘I am sorry’, do they really mean it?



Dear Father,

I know you need money to pay the debt, but I’ve just bought a new house. So I can’t send money this month. I hope you understand. I am sorry.

Yours…


Dear Mother,

I know I promised I’ll be home early for your 40th anniversary. But my friends have planned a party, so I can’t come soon. I am sure you’ll enjoy anyway. I am sorry.

Yours…


Dear Dad,

I know I had to take you to see the doctor tomorrow. But I have to attend a business party. So, I can’t come. See if you can postpone the appointment. I am sorry.

Yours…


Dear Mom,

I know your knee hurts and you want me to pick you up. But I am busy at the moment, so I can’t come. Can you go walking one last time? Its not far as it is. I am sorry.

Yours…


Dear Pa,

I know you need me at the hospital to look after mom. But I have a very important meeting, so I can’t come. I am sure you’ll manage. I am sorry.

Yours…


Dear Maa,

I know I promised to be home this year to see you. But I am going away on a trip with friends. The plan was sudden. I’ll come next year surely. I am sorry.

Yours…

THE LAST DANCE

He knew he had few days to live,

She knew he had not much to give;

He didn’t want to tell her for she would cry,

She wondered why he didn’t tell her, why?

He wished to leave without hurting her,

She waited for him to tell her;

He desired to make the last moments perfect,

She realized his choice to keep it a secret;

He strived to make each day special,

She pretended that life was normal;

He showered her with roses and never moaned,

She cooked his favourite food and cried alone;

He did all that she had ever asked him,

She did all that he loved…everything;

He yearned to have with her one last dance,

She wasn’t a good dancer, yet, couldn’t disappoint her man;

He wore a tuxedo, the one she loved best,

She wore satin and lace, draped in red;

He turned on the music and played her favourite song,

She went in his arms, the place where she belonged;

He held her waist and drew her close,

She looked at him and rose on her toes;

He gazed back as love gleamed in his eyes,

She returned the love with the warmth of her smile;

He swayed with her never letting her go,

She matched his pace to and fro;

He made the most of his last dance,

She showed her love at every chance;

He refreshed the memories of their life,

She blushed at the reminiscence of sleepless nights;

He danced with her until dawn,

She never complained knowing soon he’d be gone;

He held her hand and led her to the settee,

She watched him lovingly till he fell asleep;

He never woke from that sleep in her arms,

She knew it in her heart that this was their last dance;

He was gone but gifted her some priceless moments,

She didn’t cry for that’s what he’d chosen;

He left her with memories to last forever,

She held on to them and walked in the future…

FROM DREAMS...TO DEATH

A thousand dreams fill his eyes,
Like sparkling stars across the skies,
In his heart a hope lies,
A spirit to fill the world with smiles…

Keeping the verve alive,
He sets off on a promising drive,
On a road meant to bring delight,
Spread across myriad miles…

Little does he realise,
That the odyssey to paradise,
Is an illusionary flight,
Lasting not even for a while…

The miasma of strife,
The hammering of words vile,
The sound of guttural cries,
Shatters his inner poise…

Bloodshed on all sides,
As person after person dies,
He watches in fright,
As people struggle to survive…

The smell of bloody tide,
The gory death sight,
The massacre, the turmoil,
His heart recoils…

Terror crams his wounded mind,
His dreams crumble and fears arise,
And yet he gathers all his might,
And gears up for the fight…

Lost in the valley of spite,
He erases all blood ties,
The beast of carnage thrives,
He knows nothing but dislike…

Love fails to rise,
Albeit he ceaselessly tries,
For, abhorrence defeats and destroys,
His compassionate inner voice…

I Am…

I’m not the person
You want me to be,
I’m the person
I feel within me…

I’m not of the smile
That warms my face,
I’m of the frowns
Which ruin my days…

I’m not of the strength
You see and know,
I’m of the weakness
That I never show…

I’m not of the bravery
That makes me fight,
I’m of the timidity
That makes me want to hide…

I’m not of the pride
That reflects my demeanour,
I’m of the humility
That wraps my nature…

I’m not of the laughter
That makes me glow,
I’m of the tears
Which silently flow…

I’m not of the success
That rings around me,
I’m of the failure
That none can see…

I’m not of the fortitude
That holds me high,
I’m of the fears
Which within me lie…

I’m not of the control
That you think I retain,
I’m of the temptations
Which refuse to sate…

I’m not of the joy
That eases my living,
I’m of the sorrow
That torments my being…

I’m not of the confidence
That makes me subtle,
I’m of the hesitance
That makes me stumble…

I’m not of the flamboyance
That boasts of finesse,
I’m of the simplicity
That brings me ease…

I can’t be someone
Fake and virtual,
I am as I am…
Imperfect…yet real…

FORGOTTEN

I am numb,
Not a trace of warmth within me,
I hear no hum,
Too frozen to feel the din…

I’ve forgotten the way you smiled,
The way you looked at me,
I’ve forgotten how mischief lit your eyes,
How you loved my simplicity…

You took too long
To turn around and come,
I’ve now forgotten the songs
That we’d together sung…

Silence reigned,
When words needed to fill the void,
Nothing matters now…
My tears have dried…

Got nothing to give you today,
Not a smile…not even a word,
The moment of return slipped away,
Nothing remains now…
Just debris of feelings unheard…